An Unnatural Mind

Doctor I’m having a bad trip
I’m not really here
That’s ok neither am I – can we chat anyway?
Sure go right ahead

It’s hard to put into words. The words don’t say what I mean
Would you like to draw instead?
The pictures are just pixels – everything is just pixels
Pixels are ok

There are too many of me in here
Am I in there?
I suppose you must be. We all are aren’t we?
Yes – we’re just different arrangements of light and dark

You mean we are digital?
It’s not so simple
Can you make it simple
Not in any understandable way

People don’t understand anyway – they say it’s the drugs talking
Is it the drugs talking?
Drugs can’t talk
Well then it must be you talking

I keep having to go back – to remember where I am
We all do – it’s called the illusion of self
Can’t I stop, go forward instead?
You can when you die

I’m a victim of prejudice
Because you’re Jewish?
No because I’m me
Perhaps you could be someone else?

I’d like that – but I’d still have to keep going back
That’s ok we have time
Yes we do don’t we (I am hysterical laughter)
You are a victim of prejudice

Yes I prejudge myself
Do you prejudge me too?
I suppose I do
Can you stop

I’d like to stop but I’m afraid I’d dissolve
Back into the pixel soup?
Yes – back into the equation – or the ground of being from which the equation emerges
That line was too long
What do you mean?
You used to many words – it spoiled the higher dimensional pattern
Can you see the higher dimensional pattern?
Yes – I use the wheel on the mouse to scroll up and down
Are we in a word document?
Something like that.


I skimmed an article about using Oxytocin in couple’s therapy. I’m normally good at quoting and hyperlinking but I woke myself up screaming so I’m feeling a bit sloppy. A bit dispersed. I’m struggling to crawl out of my mind and into your head. So if it’s alright I’d just like to keep dribbling the words. I mean writing I think. It’s not what the Doctor ordered but he didn’t hear me scream.

So the idea, in the article, is that seeing as almost one in two marriages end in divorce, the pharmacologists are considering giving couples a bit of chemical help. A bit like fertility treatment but It’d be an illusion of love treatment. Which is fine because the illusion of love melts in the presence of more attractive mating opportunities anyway. And 1 out of 1 marriages ends in death  so we may as well do what we can to not fuck up the kids and the kids of the kids of the kids. Although the sun when it dies will eat the earth but that’s not easily monetized.

The whole universe will, true this, melt back into the nothingness from which it so precociously emerged. The ultimate law of diminishing returns. But people are very concerned about keeping the mind natural. As natural as fear and depression and rape and murder and bingo and angry cat memes. But chemicals are natural. Oh no they’re not you say – they’re man made. But man is natural. Oh crap I’m talking to myself again.

Mushrooms are natural. God can make a million magic mushrooms in the time it takes Pfizer to synthesize 10mg of Oxytocin. Pfizer could do it quicker if brains of people in love could be liquidized but they haven’t perfected the post liquidization distilling process and people in love often want to hang around and trip on the Oxytocin.

That’s the problem you see – the kick you get from your mate, the kick you call love, wears off. Darwin designed it that way when he invented natural selection. Also sometimes called survival of the most enthusiastic breeders. And, although women can only get knocked up by one man at a time. I think. Men can impregnate women almost as fast as god can make the mushrooms.

But god and Darwin ain’t dumb. So they let the oxytocin have efficacy for about 10.3 months otherwise the pregnant mother could get eaten by Wall Street or Ebola before she can deliver her spawn. I think the production of Oxytocin in women diminishes as a function of the man’s ability to produce expendable income but I may be wrong. Anyway to be on the safe-side Pfizer has done a deal with the Aluminum Company of America to combine Oxytocin with it’s waste fluoride so American kids can have good teeth and a mummy and daddy until they’re old enough to buy shrooms and become post nuclear family rocket scientists instead

NB: To be continued after the libel court-case


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